You aren't worth a thing, nobody is interested in what you think, mediocrity and anonymity are your best bet. If you act this way, you will never have any big problems in life."(You can read the full article here: Paulo Coelho and about the law here The Law of Jante) At the time, this statement only struck me as interesting, maybe something to think about later.
One of the reasons I came to Oslo was to visit my brother's friend who he has known for many years. His friend, besides living in Oslo, also travels to L.A. and London, among other destinations, to work on her music career, which as of this moment is about to take off after working with some of the industry's biggest names. As usual, I drifted into Oslo without any warning or planning, so I couldn't be surprised when I found out she was in London, recording. I had been in Oslo for almost two weeks before we were able to meet.
I had suggested we go to the famous statue park ( Vigeland Park and Museum) instead of something boring like sitting idly for a coffee, to which she readily agreed. She met me at my hostel after she had finished work for the day and we jumped on the next trolley to the park. I found her very easy to talk to and her charisma allowed our conversation to flow easily.
As we spoke, I learned much of what she was doing and what her goals were. It became remarkably clear I had met some one who knew exactly what she wanted and believed completely she was going to succeed. There was not that doubt that came with hope, but her success was simply a matter of fact. Indeed, as she recounted some of the accomplishments she had, in the past and recently, finished, there could be no doubt she would do what she decided to do. Her first single was to be released within a month or two, both in the UK and in Japan (I have no doubt of her success after listening to a first edit of the single).
She mentioned how she was keeping a low profile within Norway, not making any effort to gain recognition nor promote her music. My slow firing brain made the connection and exclaimed "Jante's Law!" She looked at me strangely and I felt a little defeated, but went on to explain it as I had read it. Eyes growing wide with recognition, she corrected my pronunciation "Yante's Law". Obviously, "J" in Norway is pronounced like our "Y". She went on to explain the Law in her own words and concluded that was exactly why she felt the need to pursue her career outside of Norway.
For the first time, I had met a person who was directly defying that Law believed, not only those in Scandinavia, but by people all over the world. People everywhere cling to that idea, in one fashion or another, that idea that says keep your head down and don't make waves. It was then I saw how my life had been shaped by this rule, never daring to make a spectacle or to believe I can achieve those great dreams I used to have. Many years ago, before the years of adulthood weighed down on me, I believed I would do great things. However, as with all things adult, we are taught to leave the childish dreams with our childhood and rather we should strive to fit the mold of our society. For years I struggled against the pressure of living in that mold, never quite fitting in, but without any idea how to live beyond it.
Before we parted ways, my brother's friend said something that changed everything for me. In a moment, my world was shaken again. I was lamenting about some of the things I had wanted and do want to do, but spoke of them as dreams. Interrupting me, she said, "I don't have dreams, I have goals." There it is. The challenge. I could either continue pining for the things I wish to achieve or I can achieve them.
Later, I began thinking about my dreams. What were the things I had wanted to do and would they ever come true. Like a loud bell, the thought clanged in my head, I have achieved more than one of my dreams. Not the least of which, was leaving my entire world behind to travel and live an adventure. I remember how that dream became a goal:
One evening in the middle of February, after having lost my job and not winning the competition for another I desperately needed and wanted, I sat depressed and frustrated. I had never been so poor in my life, unpaid bills were piled high and I had to ask for money from my parents just to buy groceries until the social assistance cheque arrived. My pride was shattered and knew then I had to change everything about my world. I knew I could not survive in the world as I had been, not with any measure of happiness. While I sat brooding, a thought drifted back into my consciousness, with it came a breeze, blowing the dust off an old idea. I remembered how a year previous I wanted to take some time and live abroad, but never did because I did not have the vacation time and could not save the money to keep my apartment and travel at the same time. I had let the idea gather dust, until it was hidden from my thoughts, but now it shone brightly, refusing to be ignored. My brooding grew into unrequited excitement, yes, I could do this. My dream had become my goal.
Now, I thought about other goals that had been long forgotten. Released from the confines of my own limitations, I set them as goals. I know I will achieve the success I long ago believed I could reach.
I will directly defy the Law of Jante, of Mediocrity. I will rise above my fears and set ambitious goals. I will learn from my mistakes and be blessed by my failures. I will work until I achieve my goals.
I will be great!
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